Living alone with a mental illness can be challenging, but there are strategies to make it more manageable. I’m fortunate that I never really lived alone with my mental illness. I had a young daughter with me always who had this magical ability to give me the tiniest bit of a silver lining. But at night when the depression robbed me of my sleep and all the ghosts and ghouls came out, I sure did feel alone.
In my stints in outpatient and inpatient care I met a ton of people of all ages who lived completely alone without even family to provide some comfort and support. Some were retired or unable to work and had no work friends, some had burned through their friends who no longer wanted to help someone with mental illness, and some were just natural loners who were regretting not making friends.
At one of my outpatient programs, we had a speaker who talked about living alone with serious mental illness. She told us that to make living alone as supportive as it can be, we should begin by creating a structured daily routine that included regular sleep, meals, and physical activity. We needed to try as much as possible to build a support network by staying in touch with friends, family, or mental health professionals.
In addition, we needed to utilize coping mechanisms such as mindfulness, meditation, or journaling to manage stress and emotions, and ensure a safe and organized living environment to reduce anxiety. If you’re feeling depressed and alone, you really need to reach out for support by talking to a trusted friend or family member, join a support group, engage in activities that bring you joy, and practice self-care.
For me, I created routines that I held sacred. I had very specific morning and evening rituals. I made everything around me predictable, but not so much so that a hiccup in my plans would throw me completely off track. I wanted to have as much control in the areas of my life that I could control. When you never know exactly what your mental illness will bring from day to day, it’s important to avoid crawling under the covers every day and taking control of the parts of your life that you can.
I didn’t have social media back at the height of my mental illness. Today, unless you have completely shunned social media, it’s almost impossible to be completely alone. In fact, I bet there’s a Facebook group for people who are depressed and living alone. There’s also online therapy programs. You can always find support on social media. It’s not the same as having a huge support network in real life, but in the past few years I have cobbled together an awesome group of old friends and new friends that give me so much support. Just know that if you desperately need professional help, no online group will replace that.
If you live alone with depression, comment below on what you’ve done to manage your mental health.
